Tuesday, May 10, 2011

Payne, the bathroom attendant.

If one is planning on visiting the restroom at our house, it's best to lock the door behind oneself. Otherwise, there's a high possibility of a wee person busting in when you're at your most vulnerable and "howping" you in whatever way he sees fit.

Sometimes this involves trying to squish between the toilet and the side of the cabinet so he can prematurely flush the toilet 5 times. Sometimes it means pushing up his little plastic stool so you have somewhere to rest your feet. And it will always include him carefully measuring out and tearing off a length of toilet paper, handing it to you, and saying " Here ooh go!".

Maybe I should get him a little tux and have him stand by the bathroom door with a hand towel over one arm, offering pumps of hand soap or spritzes of one's choice of perfume or cologne...

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