Saturday, July 2, 2011

Massive, massive Mommy fail day.

Let's hope my child survives the night.

This morning I took him to IHOP. While dicing up pancakes I lost a square. It fell under the table and I didn't bother to retrieve it. As we left the restaurant Payne got slightly ahead of me, plucked the 30 minute old pancake bit off of the floor, and before I could even yip, popped it into his mouth. I went something like "Uuuuugh! Nooooo!" (can we think about what might stick to a syrupy piece of pancake laying on the area people generally rest their feet for a minute?) and a table of women in front of us burst into laughter.

Strike One.

Then we ended up at Pei Wei for dinner after church. As we left THERE Payne ran ahead of me again. We spotted the rogue pea simultaneously. It lay ominously on the tile walkway out of the restaurant. We had no way of knowing how far it had traveled, or for how long it had languished unattended in it's current location. I yelped "Leave it! It's dirty!". Payne swooped, grabbed, and popped it into his mouth. I yelled "Auuuuugh! No no! That's gross!". Then I realized a woman near the door was shooting me a dirty look, so I sort of barked "Sorry!" and when she continued to look at my like I was crazy I added a stilted "...for yelling." and then bolted out of the door.

Strike Two.

I promise my kid ate something that wasn't peppered with e-coli today:

Cake and ice cream, at his cousin's birthday party.

Go me! Heh heh.

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