So, in light of Nuggette's fondness for digging her heels into my ribs and pressing her head into my bladder in a leisurely stretch, I have to cut into Payne's playground fun quite frequently for bathroom breaks. I try to sort of coax him away by asking if he can "Help Mommy go potty".
He takes this job very seriously.
He will get behind me and push my rear in the direction of the bathroom, saying "D'is way Mommy!". Once we're inside he takes my hand and guides me with great concern while spouting "Here Mommy. I howp you!" into a stall. He locks the door (his favorite part). Then he will back me up to the toilet and try to pull my pants down for me, saying "Pants Mommy, der you go!". He also brings it upon himself to pre-measure and tear off my allotment of toilet paper. After that I'm reminded to flush, and assisted with closing the door (his second favorite part). He never forgets to remind me to wash my hands, and is very diligent in obtaining paper towels for hand drying, perhaps over diligent when towel retrieval involves an automatic paper dispenser...
I genuinely believe that he thinks I couldn't do it without him. It's hilariously sweet!